Review: Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD and Deepak Chopra

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Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg

Nonviolent Communication
Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD and Deepak Chopra
Puddledancer Press
Published September 1, 2015

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About Nonviolent Communication

An enlightening look at how peaceful communication can create compassionate connections with family, friends, and other acquaintances, this international bestseller uses stories, examples, and sample dialogues to provide solutions to communication problems both at home and in the workplace. Guidance is provided on identifying and articulating feelings and needs, expressing anger fully, and exploring the power of empathy in order to speak honestly without creating hostility, break patterns of thinking that lead to anger and depression, and communicate compassionately. Included in the new edition is a chapter on conflict resolution and mediation.

My Review

Okay, so I mentioned before that more than one person has recommended this book to me. First, someone in a book club discussed it when the group read a different book on communication. Then a childhood friend brought it up. We had been talking about resolving conflict and trying to talk about difficult emotions. I tend to use a lot of what Dr. Rosenberg calls “evaluating and diagnosing language” when I talk. I think that’s what made my friend think of this book. Another friend recommended it kind of out of the blue just as a good book to read for communicating needs.

Anyway, it seemed like three recommendations from three unrelated places was plenty of reason to pick up NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION. So I did.

I listened to the audiobook first. Then, I ordered a hard copy so that I could see some of the content and exercises in print. Though I haven’t done the exercises myself yet, I would like to try them. I can see how they would be helpful for me.

One thing I liked about the book is when Dr. Rosenberg offered examples in which other people adopted nonviolent communication. He showed the impact on the conflict or situation they were in. He tells a fair number of examples of what not to do usually based on him guiding people who aren’t using nonviolent communication. Sometimes those got kind of old to me? They sometimes came across like, “Listen while I tell more stories about how silly people are and how smart I am.” Sometimes those stories were really helpful, though.

I like that this way of communicating really boils down to some simple ideas. Describe what happened. State how it made you feel and why the situation didn’t meet a need you have. Ask for a different behavior that would meet that need. Alternately, sometimes simply listening with empathy opens a path through a conflict. I liked the way he broke down how to do that as well.

Another thing that stood out to me is that when we’re faced with a situation where we aren’t able to listen with empathy, that’s a red flag. We need to respond by taking a step back, get some needs met for ourselves first. And then return to try again to listen with empathy. It’s not that I’ve never heard anything like that before, but maybe more that I felt like Dr. Rosenberg qualified that process in a more specific and clear way than I’d heard in other places.

I read some reviews about NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION before picking up the book. A few point out that the book contains a lot of anecdotal evidence and not research, which is true. There are a couple of stories in the book in which women who have been attacked use empathic listening to deescalate the situation they’re in. I thought those were both really powerful. But I also wish there had been some clarifying response after those stories talking about personal safety. Another thing I would have liked is some guidance about using nonviolent communication in situations of abuse or danger. I would have liked for him to clarify when to withdraw or get additional help.

On the whole, though, I’m really glad I read the book, and I’m eager to try to put its principles into practice in my life to see how it affects some of the relationships I have.

Content Notes for Nonviolent Communication

Recommended for Ages 12 up.

Representation
Dr. Rosenberg himself is Jewish and speaks about encountering antisemitism.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Mild profanity used infrequently.

Romance/Sexual Content
A man approaches a woman and demands that she undress. She uses nonviolent communication to deescalate the situation and he ends up stealing her purse instead of raping her.

Spiritual Content
A man asks Dr. Rosenberg’s grandmother for food, saying he is Jesus the Lord. Dr. Rosenberg shares a poem he wrote about his Jewish grandmother’s love for others. He writes that her caring for this man taught him about Jesus.

Violent Content
A man attacks a woman, shoving her to the ground and holding a knife to her throat. She uses nonviolent communication to deescalate the situation and is able to calm him down enough to get help.

Drug Content
None.

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Review: The Prince of Nowhere by Rochelle Hassan

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The Prince of Nowhere
Rochelle Hassan
HarperCollins
Published May 3, 2022

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About The Prince of Nowhere

Roda isn’t afraid of the monsters that roam the wilds of the Aerlands. She’s safe in her small town, surrounded by a wall of freezing, enchanted mist that keeps the beasts away. So when Roda rescues an injured crow on the instruction of her secret pen pal, Anonymous – whose letters arrive without warning and correctly predict the future – she’s surprised to learn she’s brought one of the so-called monsters home. Because her crow is really a shape-shifting boy named Ignis.

Ignis doesn’t remember where he was going before he crashed. But Anonymous brought him and Roda together for a reason – and the only way to find out what Anonymous wants is to follow the trail of baffling clues in Roda’s letters. Their perilous journey leads them into the mist and beyond, to a mysterious place called Nowhere. But Ignis has secrets, and the farther they get, the more Roda doubts she can trust him.

As a nefarious force closes in, they’ll have to put aside their differences and work together. For they might be each other’s only defense against an enemy who threatens their past, present, and future.

My Review

One of the things I’ve been really interested in finding are books that bridge the transition between middle grade and young adult books. Every reader is different, and some leap forward into YA without looking back. Others take longer to make that transition, even though they may feel like middle grade books become too young for them. At any rate, I feel like this book is exactly the kind of thing I have been looking for in terms of still having some middle grade themes, but written in a more mature way that I think will appeal to older readers.

I loved both Ignis and Roda. Most of the story is in Roda’s point of view. She’s smart and determined and I couldn’t get enough of her. She and Ignis tend to bicker a bit, but it feels like the way you argue with a best friend or sibling, so I found it endearing.

The plot kept me turning pages and reading chapter after chapter. I really didn’t want to put it down. I read the whole book in less than 24 hours. Some of the things that happened were things I’d been hoping for– other things took me completely by surprise.

It looks like Rochelle Hassan’s next book (which comes out next year and is titled THE BURIED AND BOUND) will be a young adult novel. I definitely want to read that, but I hope she writes more middle grade, too.

Readers who enjoyed THE STORM KEEPER’S ISLAND by Catherine Doyle or SKANDAR AND THE UNICORN THIEF by A. F. Steadman definitely need to put this one on their reading lists!

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 10 to 14.

Representation
Roda has pale skin. Ignis’s skin is gray.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
None.

Romance/Sexual Content
None.

Spiritual Content
Ignis can shapeshift into a crow. Other characters have the ability to use magic.

Violent Content
Situations of peril. Brief battle scenes causing injury. Not graphically described.

Drug Content
A woman is apparently poisoned and unconscious.

Note: This post contains affiliate links, which do not cost you anything to use, but which help support this blog. I received a free copy of THE PRINCE OF NOWHERE in exchange for my honest review.

Review: One of Us Is Next by Karen McManus

Book Review and Content, Contemporary, Mystery/Suspense/Thriller, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , , , , ,

One of Us Is Next (One of Us Is Lying #2)
Karen McManus
Delacorte Press for Young Readers
Published January 7, 2020

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About One of Us Is Next

Come on, Bayview, you know you’ve missed this.

A ton of copycat gossip apps have popped up since Simon died, but in the year since the Bayview four were cleared of his shocking death, no one’s been able to fill the gossip void quite like he could. The problem is no one has the facts.

Until now.

This time it’s not an app, though—it’s a game.

Truth or Dare.

Phoebe’s the first target. If you choose not to play, it’s a truth. And hers is dark.

Then comes Maeve and she should know better—always choose the dare.

But by the time Knox is about to be tagged, things have gotten dangerous. The dares have become deadly, and if Maeve learned anything from Bronwyn last year, it’s that they can’t count on the police for help. Or protection.

Simon’s gone, but someone’s determined to keep his legacy at Bayview High alive. And this time, there’s a whole new set of rules.

The highly anticipated sequel to the New York Times bestselling thriller everyone is talking about, One of Us Is Lying! There’s a new mystery to solve at Bayview High, and there’s a whole new set of rules.

My Review

I had a little bit of a rough start with this book. It’s been a while since I read ONE OF US IS LYING, but actually, ONE OF US IS NEXT does a great job reacquainting us with the characters from the previous book. The downside of that was that it also introduced a lot of characters in the first couple of chapters and it took me a bit to get everyone and their connections all sorted out.

Once I had that all figured out, I pretty quickly got into the book. As with the first book, clues about what’s happening come from surprising places. Everyone has secrets and motives that aren’t always clear cut.

I liked this cast of characters, too. Maeve is a cancer survivor, and she begins having symptoms of a relapse but doesn’t want to face it. So she decides not to tell anyone. I can’t tell you how much I wanted to reach into the story and beg her not to do that. I loved the way we got to know her and the things she learned about herself in the story.

Phoebe was also a great character. Her rocky relationship with her sister resonated with me a lot. And I loved all that happened as she got to know and grow closer to Maeve and Knox. The story left me with one Phoebe question that I really wanted answered. She discovers a connection to her past and doesn’t ever seem to consider whether the person who had that connection sought her out knowing who she was or if it was a terrible coincidence. Maybe that question gets answered in ONE OF US IS BACK, which comes out next summer?

On the whole, I liked this one. It had a lot of reveals in the places I needed them. It kept me guessing in some places and kept me turning pages, super tense about what would happen, in other places. If you liked ONE OF US IS LYING, definitely check this one out.

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 14 up.

Representation
Maeve is Colombian American and a cancer survivor.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Extreme profanity used fairly frequently.

Romance/Sexual Content
Kissing between boy and girl. References to sex. References to a boy being bullied in the past because he was outed as gay. A girl gets bullied because of rumors she slept with someone. A boy gets bullied because of rumors he wasn’t aroused when his girlfriend was prepared to have sex with him.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
References to an accidental death at a construction site. Threatening messages online and through text messages. A high school student dies. Four other students witness his death. A boy hits another boy hard enough to give him a concussion.

See spoiler section below for additional information.

Drug Content
One scene shows a house party at which teens are drinking alcohol.

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SPOILER

A bomb explodes, injuring people.

Review: Upstander by James Preller

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Upstander
James Preller
Feiwel & Friends
Published May 11, 2021

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About Upstander

Girl bullies, internet bullying, and substance use are themes in this James Preller middle grade standalone companion to Bystander

Mary O’Malley is tired of keeping secrets. Secrets like her older brother, Jonny’s, drug use. Starting seventh grade is tough enough without the upheaval her brother is bringing to their family.

It seems the only person who might understand is Griffen Connolly, whose older sister runs with Jonny in the wrong crowd. Mary thought Griff was too cool, too popular for her. But now he wants to hang out with her, and listen.

When two girls Mary thought were her friends decide to slam another girl online, Mary tries to look the other way. Then the girls turn on Mary, and suddenly, she doesn’t have a safety zone. Her brother is out of control, her family’s energies are all spent on him. There is only one person she can turn to. But can she trust Griff? Or is he one of the bullies?

My Review

This book reminded me a little bit of MARY UNDERWATER by Shannon Doleski, which I absolutely loved. In addition to being a book about a girl named Mary, UPSTANDER is about a sensitive, smart girl battling the violence of bullying and trying to find ways to love her brother despite his drug use disorder.

Mary faces a lot of challenging relationships. First, two of her girl friends make it clear they want to exclude a third girl, leaving Mary to decide whether to follow along. Then, a boy Mary spends time with teams up with two other boys to bully neighborhood kids. Again Mary finds herself in the middle, and she has to decide whether or not to speak up.

As Mary’s brother’s addiction becomes increasingly destructive to her family, Mary faces the same challenge about speaking up in her own family. Does she stay silent when her brother and mom fight, or is there a way to intervene and let them know how she feels?

Mary wrestles with these big emotions and complex relationships, all the while seeking to be true to herself and her personal values of kindness and generosity. She doesn’t always make the right choices, but she never stops trying to learn or to find a way through that doesn’t cause harm to someone else.

I loved this heartfelt, powerful story. I haven’t read BYSTANDER, which is a companion to this book and was published first, but I definitely want to read it now. So, I would love to see more of the community around Mary and read more by James Preller.

Content Notes

Content warning for drug addiction and bullying violence.

Recommended for Ages 10 to 14.

Representation
Some minor characters are Black.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
None.

Romance/Sexual Content
An adult talks about marring another adult. A boy moves in with his girlfriend. Mary discovers she has feelings for a boy at school. A girl talks about a boy asking her to send sexy pictures of herself. Later she mentions that she has sent him something, but isn’t specific what it is.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
Instances of bullying. A group of boys harass another boy, squirting ketchup packets on him. They bully another boy, threatening to take his basketball. A group of boys beat up another boy.

Drug Content
Mary’s brother is addicted to drugs. He steals items from their home and argues with Mary’s mom. Off-scene, a girl experiences a drug overdose. A boy who was there describes it afterward.

Note: This post contains affiliate links, which do not cost you anything to use, but which help support this blog. I received a free copy of Upstander in exchange for my honest review.

Review: Silvertongue by Charlie Fletcher

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Silvertongue (Stoneheart #3) by Charlie Fletcher
Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
Published April 7, 2009

Amazon | Goodreads

About Silvertongue

The city of London is in the middle of one of its most destructive wars in history. And yet most of its inhabitants don’t even know it. The battle between the statues and gargoyles of London rages on. The stakes are high, with the spits engaged in a struggle against the evil taints that will determine the fate of their very souls. Twelve year old George Chapman and his friend Edie are caught in the middle. A glint with the ability to “see” the past, Edie has become a crucial asset in the ongoing war. The Gunner, a statue of a World War I soldier, continues do his part to help them in their quest. But George knows that he is the one who must play the biggest role in helping to bring an end to the war.

With the Walker intent on forcing his evil designs on London and the world, George realizes that his destiny is inextricably tied to the Walker’s destruction. In the end, the most important soul he manages to save might just be his own. Filled with intriguing suspense, invigorating action sequences, and well developed characters, SILVERTONGUE is a thrilling conclusion to the international blockbuster Stoneheart trilogy.

My Review

I listened to the audiobook version of SILVERTONGUE, which is narrated by Jim Dale. He does an amazing job bringing the characters to life. Once I’d read STONEHEART, the first book in the series, I knew I would have to read the rest of it.

This book follows George and Edie a lot more closely than the last one. As they get ready for a final battle to banish the evil that slipped into this world at the end of the second book, they rally new allies and discover new enemies. The ever faithful Gunner (my favorite character) remains by their sides.

I feel like the first two books set up the conflicts in this one really well, so that I began this book with a lot of expectations for things I hoped would happen. Lots of those expectations were met or exceeded. I loved the way some of the storylines played out, especially with some of the minor characters like Little Tragedy, and even the snippets of Edie’s mom’s life from the past.

I think the first book in the series will always be my favorite, but I loved following George and Edie all the way to the end of their story. It had an awesome ending, something I didn’t expect but loved so much anyway.

I think fans of the Percy Jackson series would love these books. They’re perfect for readers transitioning out of middle grade and into lower YA.

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 10 to 14.

Representation
Both the main characters are white kids from England. Other characters are statues.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Mild profanity used infrequently.

Romance/Sexual Content
One of the statues is wrapped in a cloth that looks like only the breeze keeps it in place. Another wears only a cape. (No descriptions of nudity.)

Spiritual Content
Statues have come alive. Some characters called Makers can create or damage statues with power in their hands. Others called Glints can sense memories of events that stones have witnessed. An evil from another world has slipped into Edie and George’s world and must be stopped.

Violent Content
Battle scenes usually involving statues. Situations of peril and some references to torture involving George and Edie.

Drug Content
Edie witnesses scenes from the past in which her mother and other adults drink a lot of alcohol.

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Review: The Big Dreams of Small Creatures by Gail Lerner

Book Review and Content, Fantasy, Middle Grade 8-12, , , , , ,

The Big Dreams of Small Creatures
Gail Lerner
Nancy Paulsen Books
Published October 4, 2022

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About The Big Dreams of Small Creatures

From Black-ish writer and director comes a whimsical and heartwarming tale where two unlikely allies band together to protect and defend the insect world from the worst enemy of all…humans.

Ten-year-old Eden’s quiet life is upended when she saves a paper wasp nest from destruction and discovers, to her awe and amazement, that she and its haughty queen can talk to each other. This first conversation is the start of a grand adventure, leading Eden to The Institute for Lower Learning, a secret laboratory devoted to the peaceful coexistence of humans and insects. The Institute is more fantastic and idyllic than Eden could’ve imagined but hidden deep within its tunnels is an old secret that could spell the end for all insects on earth.

Nine-year-old August, an aspiring actor and bullied fourth-grader, is looking for that very secret after a few disastrous encounters have left him wanting to squash every annoying bug into oblivion. After all insects are small—he is big. And if there is anything he’s learned from the bullies at school—it’s that being bigger is what counts.

But in the world of the Institute where insects have a place of their own, both Eden and August discover being bigger isn’t necessarily better and sometimes the most courageous thing to do is to set out to make a new friend.

My Review

There are a lot of cute things about this book. I really liked the concept. The story follows four characters. There’s August and Eden and their quests to destroy or save insects. There’s also Atom, an ant who wants to save his sister. And we follow the queen wasp who first communicated with Eden.

The story has a lot of goofy and silly moments in it. Lots of them are improbable at best, but I think that’s part of the story’s charm. It doesn’t seem like the author meant it to be realistic fiction, but more an imaginative dive into what a world where insects and people could communicate with one another.

I liked Eden’s character a lot, and I appreciated the humorous moments in the story. Maybe the trickiest thing about the book is that thematically, I think it would appeal to younger readers, maybe ages seven to nine? But the book is about 350 pages, which I think is probably too much for a lot of readers that age.

All in all, this was a fun book to read and a really interesting concept for a novel. I think readers who like insects or enjoy books like DAISY WOODWORM CHANGES THE WORLD by Melissa Hart should check this one out.

Content Notes for The Big Dreams of Small Creatures

Recommended for Ages 8 to 10.

Representation
Eden’s mom is Jewish and her dad is Black.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Some talk about bodily functions. A boy vomits on a teacher.

Romance/Sexual Content
None.

Spiritual Content
Eden learns to speak Wasp and communicate with a queen paper wasp. There are stories of other humans communicating with insects.

Violent Content
Augie experiences bullying by classmates. He also has some mishaps involving insects (a roach crawling on him, a fly accidentally getting in his mouth, and him walking into a spiderweb).

Drug Content
None.

Note: This post contains affiliate links, which do not cost you anything to use, but which help support this blog. I received a free copy of THE BIG DREAMS OF SMALL CREATURES in exchange for my honest review.