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Review: Always the Almost by Edward Underhill

Book Review and Content, Contemporary, Romance, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , , , ,
Always the Almost by Edward Underhill

Always the Almost
Edward Underhill
Wednesday Books
Published February 7, 2023

Amazon | Bookshop | Goodreads

About Always the Almost

A trans pianist makes a New Year’s resolution on a frozen Wisconsin night to win regionals and win back his ex, but a new boy complicates things in Edward Underhill’s heartfelt debut YA rom-dram, ALWAYS THE ALMOST.

Sixteen-year-old trans boy Miles Jacobson has two New Year’s resolutions: 1) win back his ex-boyfriend (and star of the football team) Shane McIntyre, and 2) finally beat his slimy arch-nemesis at the Midwest’s biggest classical piano competition. But that’s not going to be so easy. For one thing, Shane broke up with Miles two weeks after Miles came out as trans, and now Shane’s stubbornly ignoring him, even when they literally bump into each other. Plus, Miles’ new, slightly terrifying piano teacher keeps telling him that he’s playing like he “doesn’t know who he is”—whatever that means.

Then Miles meets the new boy in town, Eric Mendez, a proudly queer cartoonist from Seattle who asks his pronouns, cares about art as much as he does—and makes his stomach flutter. Not what he needs to be focusing on right now. But after Eric and Miles pretend to date so they can score an invite to a couples-only Valentine’s party, the ruse turns real with a kiss, which is also definitely not in the plan. If only Miles could figure out why Eric likes him so much. After all, it’s not like he’s cool or confident or comfortable in his own skin. He’s not even good enough at piano to get his fellow competitors to respect him, especially now, as Miles. Nothing’s ever been as easy for him as for other people—other boys. He’s only ever been almost enough.

So why, when he’s with Eric, does it feel like the only person he’s ever really not been enough for…is himself?

My Review

Miles is preparing for a classical piano competition, so he plays the piano in lots of scenes. I really enjoyed the descriptions of his relationship with music and his process of practicing, learning, and growing as a musician. I loved Stefanie, his piano teacher, too.

Though he doesn’t have a lot of confidence in his identity, Miles has a solid friend group who do. Rachel, Paige, and Eric support him as friends and allies. Sometimes they can be a little much– especially Rachel– but it’s clear that their behavior always comes from a place of love.

ALWAYS THE ALMOST doesn’t shy away from the painful parts of personal growth. Miles makes some thoughtless and selfish choices and then has to bear consequences of those mistakes as well as learning how to rebuild relationships in the aftermath. I thought overall those conflicts were handled really well and resolved in ways that were both believable and satisfying.

On the whole, Miles’s journey as a young trans boy in love and his development as a musician were both super strong parts of ALWAYS THE ALMOST. I think readers who enjoyed CAN’T TAKE THAT AWAY by Steven Salvatore will want to check this one out.

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 12 up.

Representation
Miles is a transgender boy. Eric is pansexual and biracial. Rachel and Paige are lesbians.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Extreme profanity used somewhat frequently.

Romance/Sexual Content
Kissing between two girls. Kissing between two boys. Miles and his boyfriend take their tops off at one point.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
Miles stumbles onto some transphobic comments about him on an online forum. Vague reference to a woman experiencing unwanted sexual advances at work and a man punishing her in her career because she refused him.

Drug Content
None.

Note: This post contains affiliate links, which do not cost you anything to use, but which help support this blog. I received a free copy of ALWAYS THE ALMOST in exchange for my honest review.

Review: Hurricane Season by Nicole Melleby

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Hurricane Season
Nicole Melleby
Algonquin Young Readers
Available May 7, 2019

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Goodreads

About HURRICANE SEASON

Fig, a sixth grader, wants more than anything to see the world as her father does. The once-renowned pianist, who hasn’t composed a song in years and has unpredictable good and bad days, is something of a mystery to Fig. Though she’s a science and math nerd, she tries taking an art class just to be closer to him, to experience life the way an artist does. But then Fig’s dad shows up at school, disoriented and desperately searching for Fig. Not only has the class not brought Fig closer to understanding him, it has brought social services to their door.

Diving into books about Van Gogh to understand the madness of artists, calling on her best friend for advice, and turning to a new neighbor for support, Fig continues to try everything she can think of to understand her father, to save him from himself, and to find space in her life to discover who she is even as the walls are falling down around her.

Nicole Melleby’s Hurricane Season is a stunning novel about a girl struggling to be a kid as pressing adult concerns weigh on her. It’s also about taking risks and facing danger, about love and art, and about coming of age and coming out. And more than anything else, it is a story of the healing power of love—and the limits of that power.

My Review

One of my favorite things about HURRICANE SEASON is the evolution of Fig’s relationship with her dad. At the beginning she really idolizes him and feels super defensive of him, even when he’s doing things that make her life a lot harder. She blames their problems on her teacher who called social services. Or on hurricane season for drawing her dad to the shoreline during its dangerous storms.

As Fig’s dad’s behavior deteriorates and starts to affect her relationships at school, she grows to resent him and his mental health problems. She feels guilty and frustrated at herself, and eventually frustrated with her dad when he’s not able to do things with her that she needs, like going to an art exhibit that’s important to her, or going to her art show at school.

Even as their relationship frays, Fig and her dad continue to share rituals that bond them. I loved their exchange: “I love you.” “Double it.” “Love you, love you.”

And in the midst of it all, a miracle happens. A new person joins their family, and as so often happens when a situation is out of control, it’s that person who helps everyone realize how untenable things have become. I liked this catalyst character in the story, too, though at times he seemed almost too perfect.

I loved the way HURRICANE SEASON used details about Van Gogh’s life and his work to frame what was happening with Fig’s dad and even Fig herself.

Also worthy of note: this is a medication-positive story. Fig’s dad eventually begins taking medication to regulate his mental health, and while the solution isn’t perfect– the story shows some difficulty getting dosage and prescriptions right for him– it’s clear that it makes a positive difference in all of their lives.

Readers who enjoyed THE BENEFITS OF BEING AN OCTOPUS by Ann Braden or NEST by Esther Ehrlich need to put HURRICANE SEASON on their reading lists.

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 10 to 14.

Representation
All the major characters are white. Fig’s dad is from London. Fig likes girls. A man begins a romantic relationship with another man.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Mild profanity used once.

Romance/Sexual Content
Two men kiss. A girl has a crush on another girl.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
None.

Drug Content 
None.

Note: I received a free copy of HURRICANE SEASON by Nicole Melleby in exchange for my honest review. This post contains affiliate links which cost you nothing but which help support this blog.