Tag Archives: relationships

Review: Before I Knew You by Beth Steury

Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , , ,

Before I Knew You by Beth SteuryBefore I Knew You
Beth Steury
Life Matters Publishing
Published on March 9, 2018

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About Before I Knew You
After a series of bad choices rocked his world, seventeen-year-old Preston charts a new course as far from his ladies’ man ways as he can get. He distances himself from the dating scene and avoids his party-loving friends—the things that once dominated his life. Then he meets Maggie, the new girl in town, the first day of their junior year. She’s beautiful on the inside and out, knows nothing of his past, and he can’t get her out of his mind.

When a disastrous first date leaves her skeptical about the guys at Madison High, Maggie slows down her pursuit of a guy to trust with her white-wedding-dress future. She wants a boyfriend, sure, but he’d have to be nothing like the jerk who forced her first kiss. Someone more like Preston, who’s been nothing but sweet and helpful, not to mention, easy on the eyes. But he is so out of her league.

Can Maggie afford to let her guard down around the charming Preston? Will Preston’s past jeopardize his chances with the one girl who could anchor his future?

My Review
Before I Knew You has a strong message. At its heart, the story is about two teens who make a commitment to abstain from sex before marriage. Both have made the decision independently and because of their faith.

I worried a little bit that the story would be message-driven or dominated by the agenda of promoting abstinence. But honestly, I felt like it had a great balance between the message and the story. The message elements were pretty effectively integrated into the story, so that it didn’t feel preachy. It felt like observing two people as they try to navigate how to have a healthy dating relationship which includes these moral values.

Preston feels pressure to hide the fact that he used to drink and has slept with a past girlfriend from Maggie, which creates lots of problems and tension. Maggie is new to dating relationships and has never had a serious relationship at all before she begins dating Preston. Her struggle is much more emotional. Her feelings for Preston dominate her thought life, and sometimes her value depends a lot on his behavior and how he feels about her.

Maggie’s feelings about Preston were sometimes a little much for me. She’s a realistic teen character—I remember feeling consumed by relationships the way she is in the story. I kind of wished that someone at some point told her she needed to find her value in other things besides Preston. It also kind of rubbed me the wrong way when Preston decides to handle a past situation by planning to confront someone else’s parents about it. At the time, he is dead-set on hiding the whole situation from his own parents, and I kept hoping someone would call him out on that hypocrisy or encourage him to be honest about it with his parents. It didn’t happen, but the conflict did get resolved. (Sorry to be so cryptic… I don’t want to give too much away.)

Another thing I did like about Before I Knew You was that as the relationship between Preston and Maggie deepens, Preston rekindles a mentoring relationship with a sports coach. He and some other guys his age start spending time together and talking about how to maintain their commitment to abstinence. This was another point where I felt like the message could have overtaken the story, but it didn’t. In fact, I liked that the characters were pretty real about how they needed to have a plan and boundaries in place if they were going to have a successful and lasting commitment to wait until marriage to have sex, and how the story showed those playing out.

This book may not appeal to everyone. But especially for teens interested in waiting to have sex, it’s a great “you’re not the only one” kind of story with some practical examples of things to do that can help support the choice to wait to have sex.

Recommended for Ages 13 up.

Cultural Elements
Major characters are white.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
None.

Romance/Sexual Content
None.

Spiritual Content
Both Maggie and Preston are Christians. Their faith comes up now and again in mostly small ways – references to church or prayer or Bible verses. The biggest faith element in the story is Maggie and Preston’s commitments to wait until marriage to have sex.

Violent Content
None.

Drug Content
Preston goes to a party where teens are drinking alcohol. He only drinks Mountain Dew, as he’s made a commitment not to drink alcohol anymore. Maggie attends a similar party but doesn’t drink alcohol either.

Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

Review: Your Destination is on the Left by Lauren Spieller

Book Review and Content, Contemporary, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , , , , ,

Your Destination is on the Left
Lauren Spieller
Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
Published on June 26, 2018

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About Your Destination is on the Left
Dessa Rhodes is a modern day nomad. Her family travels in an RV, their lives defined by state lines, exit signs, and the small communal caravan they call home. Among them is Cyrus, her best friend and long-time crush, whom she knows she can never be with. When your families are perpetually linked, it’s too dangerous to take a risk on romance.

Instead, Dessa looks to the future. She wants to be a real artist and going to art school is her ticket to success and a new life. There’s just one problem: she hasn’t been accepted…anywhere. Suddenly her future is wide open, and it looks like she’s going to be stuck traveling forever.

Then an unexpected opportunity presents itself: an internship working with a local artist in Santa Fe. Dessa struggles to prove to her boss—and herself—that she belongs there, but just as she finally hits her stride, her family suffers an unexpected blow. Faced with losing everything that she has worked for, Dessa has a difficult decision to make. Will she say goodbye to her nomadic lifestyle and the boy she loves? Or will she choose to never stop moving?

My Review
I liked that Dessa’s major goal wasn’t to find true love or be in a relationship. While romance is an important element of the story, Dessa’s real goal is to go to college and craft a future for herself. This creates some problems between her and her family as her parents want her to stay with them and continue traveling. It also strains her relationship with her best friend Cyrus, because he reads her desire for another life as a rejection of the life he’s chosen. So Dessa faces a difficult journey as she tries to find a way to do what she feels is best for her without hurting the people she loves most.

At one point, Dessa’s dad asks her to keep a secret from her mom. Dessa keeps the secret, but feels guilty about the lie and frustrated that her dad continues to lie to the family, too. I loved her relationship with her grandmother, who acts as a pillar of strength and a sort of home base for Dessa and her family. She doesn’t direct the story, but she sometimes serves as a mirror, reflecting Dessa’s true desires back to her sometimes without any words.

Dessa’s artwork also plays a major role in the story. I loved that. The descriptions of her artwork and the art of the woman who mentors her had me wishing for a studio and paintbrushes or a day at the museum.

On the whole, I liked the balance between Dessa’s dreams for the future, which she won’t compromise for a relationship that might only be for right now, and her relationships. I loved the way art was represented in and played a role in the story, too. Readers who liked Stacie Ramey’s The Sister Pact and How to Be Brave by E. Katherine Kottaras will want to check this one out.

Recommended for Ages 16 and up.

Cultural Elements
Dessa’s family is Greek. Cyrus’s family is black.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Extreme profanity used regularly throughout the book.

Romance/Sexual Content
Kissing between boy and girl and tops removed. Dessa says they don’t have sex but come close.

Spiritual Content
Dessa’s grandmother is Greek Orthodox. There are a couple mentions of her going to church or passing mentions of her faith. At one point, she and Dessa plan to spend time alone together, and her grandmother says, it’s going to be her, Dessa, and the Lord.

Violent Content
Dessa throws a cup of beer in the face of a cruel boy.

Drug Content
Dessa drinks beer with a friend after they both sneak into a bar together, and later drinks champagne (provided by her grandmother) with Cyrus.

Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

 

Review: The Universe is Expanding and So Am I by Carolyn Mackler

Book Review and Content, Contemporary, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , ,

The Universe is Expanding and So Am I
Carolyn Mackler
Bloomsbury
Published on June 5, 2018

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About The Universe is Expanding and So Am I
Virginia Shreves’ world implodes again in this long-awaited follow-up to Printz Honoree The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things.

Sixteen-year-old Virginia Shreves’ life is finally back on course: she’s accepted who she is inside and out and is rebuilding her relationship with brother Byron, whose date-rape charge shattered everything.

But just as she adjusts to her new normal, her world turns upside down again. Sparks with boyfriend Froggy fade, her best friend bombshells bad news, and then the police arrest Byron. As Virginia struggles to cope, she meets Sebastian, an artist with his own baggage. The pair vow not to share personal drama. But secrets have a way of coming out, and theirs could ruin everything.

My Review
In the opening scene, Virginia is making out with her boyfriend. Because the story starts there, I wasn’t sure what kind of content it would have, but that’s the most explicit scene in the whole book. Mostly it shows her conflicted feelings about her relationship. She feels that, because she’s overweight, she should be grateful to have a boyfriend and shouldn’t risk breaking up with him and being alone forever. But she’s definitely not into the make-out session like she would have been on another day.

I like Virginia. She’s smart and self-contained and independent. I love that she was taking a kick-boxing class! Somehow that made total sense for her, and it was a neat, unusual thing in the story.

Ultimately, The Universe is Expanding and So Am I is about relationships. Virginia’s relationships with her parents, her siblings, her friends, her boyfriend Froggy, and her new friend Sebastian all change through the course of the story. I loved the way that redefining those relationships showed her own personal growth, and that some of the relationships that affected her most, like the tree lady, were ones she might once have dismissed. Fans of The Best Possible Answer by E. Katherine Kottaras should add this one to their reading lists.

Recommended for Ages 14 up.

Cultural Elements
Major characters are white.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Extreme profanity used with moderate frequency.

Romance/Sexual Content
In the opening scene, Virginia is making out with her boyfriend. She mentions that they’ve had shirts off together before, but nothing further. This time, though, her boyfriend wants to do more. She stops him.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
Virginia’s brother is accused of rape. We don’t learn the details of the incident, but it’s referenced a number of times.

Drug Content
Virginia’s brother is only 20, but her parents have allowed him to drink in the past. He was drunk the night he’s accused of raping a friend. (Sometimes Virginia’s parents seem to lean on this as an excuse for his behavior. Virginia makes it very clear she doesn’t buy that.) Byron gets drunk another time and Virginia has to take him home.

Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

Review: Almost There by Laurel Garver

Book Review and Content, Christian World-View, Contemporary, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , , , , ,

Almost There
Laurel Garver
Createspace
Available May 17, 2016

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Just before Dani and her mother escape to Paris for healing and restoration, Dani learns that her grandfather has been hospitalized. The Paris trip was supposed to be the inspiration to create the artwork that will make Dani’s mother a star, plus the project that will save Dani’s own grade in art class. Now, unless Dani can fix up her grandfather’s house, repair the damaged relationships between him and his children, and find someone to care for the ornery man while they’re gone, her trip is a lost cause.

Dani can’t give up, especially when she learns of her grandmother’s dreams that one day her mom would become a famous painter. As Dani struggles to make her life into the perfect happily-ever-after, she discovers that the people she loves most have other plans, other dreams than the ones she imagined for them. She learns that like her grandfather, she, too must learn to love others beyond what they do for her and for themselves.

I really liked this story. I found Dani easy to identify with. Her struggles with trying to make things turn out right for everyone else really resonated with me, as did her confusion over her feelings for her neighbor and her hurt over her boyfriend’s behavior toward her. It definitely echoed my own teen experience in some ways.

The faith elements play a strong role in the story, but they didn’t seem to dominate or steal the show. I liked that prayer was kind of a natural part of Dani’s life, and that the author included it in such an open, organic way. To me it felt more experiential and less preachy, which I think is a great thing.

If you liked To Get to You by Joanne Bischof, check out Almost There for the similar innocent romance and organic expression of Christian faith.

Recommended for Ages 14 up.

Cultural Elements
All characters appear to be white. Dani’s family is wealthy as is her boyfriend’s and friend’s. She meets a boy from much more humble background.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
None.

Romance/Sexual Content
Dani and her boyfriend are very close but have agreed not to have sex until after marriage. They share kisses, and she becomes nervous if she thinks he has ideas beyond that.

Spiritual Content
Dani and her friends pray at difficult intervals throughout the story. Dani shares her faith with her mom, not like salvation prayers, but more like sharing her current experience. For instance, she talks of learning to trust that God will work things out in her life. These deep faith moments happen as though they’re a part of normal life, which might be strange for some readers, but accurately depicts the kind of faith experience of some evangelical Christian families.

Violent Content
Dani’s grandfather becomes violent when he doesn’t get his way. Nothing huge, but his temper is definitely not under control. A fire leaves one man dead.

Drug Content
Dani worries about her uncle, a recovering addict. She learns that her friend’s dad is an alcoholic. The story shows no drug abuse.

Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

 

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Review: Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan

Book Review and Content, Contemporary, Young Adult/Teen 12-18, , , ,

Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist
Rachel Cohn and David Levithan
Ember
Published August 28, 2007 (Orig. published 2006)

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When the girl who just dumped him walks into the club where Nick’s band is playing a show, he resorts to the extreme and asks the random girl standing next to him if she’ll be his girlfriend for five minutes.

Though Nick’s request at first infuriates Norah (what kind of cheap trick does he take her for?), the approach of her not-quite-friend prompts her to take some desperate measures of her own. Like yanking almost-stranger-Nick into an electrifying kiss.

The agreed on five minutes stretches into a whole night of adventure, misunderstanding, reflection and romance. Cohn and Levithan weave a tale full of teen angst, hormones, confusion and of course music. It’s a wild ride from start to finish.

I sometimes feel like the odd one out on this book. So many people rave about it, and I felt like I just didn’t get it. I didn’t find either Nick or Norah particularly likeable. Some of the plot elements felt a little too convenient to me. When Norah ends up in the bathroom with another girl who kisses her, to show her how to kiss a boy, I remember thinking, this is what some men wish happened in women’s bathrooms. It felt more like a fantasy rather than a believable element to the plot.

Also, the language was pretty over the top. I mean, I get that the scene in which the F-bomb gets grossly overused was supposed to be ridiculous, but it was just way too much for me.

If you’re really into boundary-pushing books about music and unrealistic relationships, this might be exactly the book for you.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Extreme profanity used frequently. On one page the f-bomb drops no less than 25 times.

Sexual Content
Several scenes of same sex kissing. Twice Nick and Norah retreat to some measure of privacy to have sex. Those scenes are pretty heavy and specific. Several times sex and sexual topics are discussed in conversation. The couple also goes to see a burlesque show that features “nuns.”

**SPOILER**
Nick and Norah do not actually have sex in the story… both times they’re interrupted for different reasons, but it’s by a hair’s breadth.

Spiritual Content
Norah comments somewhat sarcastically in prayer a couple of times.

Violent Content
None

Drug Content
The club where the band plays serves alcohol and some underage drinking occurs. (Nick and Norah drink virgin drinks at the burlesque club.)

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