Cherished Belonging: The Healing Power of Love in Divided Times
Gregory Boyle
Avid Reader Press / Simon & Schuster
Published November 5, 2024
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About Cherished Belonging
At a time when society is more fractured than ever before, beloved Jesuit priest Gregory Boyle invites us to see the world through a new lens of connection and build the loving community that we long to live in—a perfect message for readers of Anne Lamott, Mary Oliver, and Richard Rohr.
Over the past thirty years, Father Gregory Boyle has transformed thousands of lives through his work as the founder of Homeboy Industries, the largest gang-intervention program in the world. The program runs on two unwavering (1) Everyone is unshakably good (no exceptions) and (2) we belong to each other (no exceptions).
Boyle believes that these two ideas allow all of us to cultivate a new way of seeing. Every community wants to be a safe place, where people are seen, and then are cherished. By remembering that we belong to each other, we find our way out of chaos and its dispiriting tribalism. Pooka, a former gang member who now oversees the program’s housing division, puts it “Here, love is our lens. It’s how we see things.”
In Cherished Belonging, Boyle calls back to Christianity’s origins as a subversive spiritual movement of equality, emancipation, and peace. Early Christianity was a way of life—not a set of beliefs. Boyle’s vision of community isn’t just a space for an individual to heal, but for people to join together and heal each other in a new collective living, a world dedicated to kindness as a constant and radical act of defiance. “The answer to every question is, indeed, compassion,” Boyle exhorts. He calls us to cherish and nurture the connections that are all around us and live with radical kindness.
My Review
Cherished Belonging is the fourth book by Gregory Boyle that I’ve read, and I’ve read his first three books as audiobooks multiple times each. I love his emphasis on loving others and the importance of learning from others and approaching every relationship ready to learn something. In this book, he focuses on two central ideas: that each of us is good and that we belong to one another. He posits that if we could truly grasp and remember those things, we’d solve the world’s problems.
I went back and forth between the audiobook and the ebook versions of this book. (I received the ebook version through NetGalley but purchased the audiobook version myself.) I liked being able to read the text more slowly, stopping to think about the ideas Boyle presents and then return to the beginning of a chapter and listen to the author read the audiobook version.
Viewing Others Compassionately
I struggled with some of the concepts in the book. He labels believing conspiracies or behaving in racist ways as evidence of mental illness. No one whole/well, he writes, would do those things.
I think I understand what he’s trying to say, but for me, this bumped against some of the ways people have used mental illness as a scapegoat for terrible things, which adds to the stigma of mental illness.
The way that he writes about mental illness makes it clear that there should be no stigma. This isn’t about blaming people for being unwell or anything. It’s about looking at people who act out of anger or hate and seeing that through a lens that acknowledges that they’ve been hurt or are not thinking clearly or seeing others clearly. They’ve forgotten that we belong to one another.
Nevertheless, if you have feelings about the way that language surrounding mental health issues is used, this is going to be, at best, a challenging read. I’m not sure what I would think if this was the first book by this author that I picked up.
On the other hand, I think Gregory Boyle raises many great questions and offers some profound insight into the cultural moment in which we stand. He specifically talks about how we tend to wear clothing with messaging and its impact on people around us. He pulls quotes and wisdom from many different spiritual disciplines, connecting truths from many different perspectives across time and faiths.
Conclusion
I don’t think I would describe this book as my favorite of the four I’ve read by this author. It might be the one that made me think the most, though. The most critical aspects of faith that I’m currently pursuing are loving others and understanding God’s love for us. The book offers some profound insights on both those topics, and I enjoyed reading it.
Content Notes
Recommended for Ages 16 up.
Representation
Boyle (a white man) shares the stories of an inclusive group of homies who work at Homeboy Industries, including Black, Latine, and Asian people.
Profanity/Crude Language Content
Some use of swearing.
Romance/Sexual Content
None.
Spiritual Content
Boyle is a Jesuit priest and shares his worldview in the text. It’s an inclusive, loving, and affirming faith. He emphasizes a belief in the goodness of all, no exceptions, and that we belong to each other. He asserts that the wrongs in the world relate to people being unwell and/or forgetting those ideas.
Violent Content
References to gang violence, abuse, and domestic violence.
Drug Content
References to people using drugs or drinking alcohol (not shown on scene).
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