Review: Not If You Break Up With Me First by G. F. Miller

Not If You Break Up With Me First
G. F. Miller
Aladdin
Published June 4, 2024

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About Not If You Break Up With Me First

Two friends who have unhappily found themselves in an accidental relationship try to drive the other one to call things off in this tongue-in-cheek middle grade romance.

Childhood friends Eve and Andrew are destined to be together— everyone says so, especially their friends and classmates who are all suddenly crush-obsessed. So when Eve and Andrew’s first eighth grade school dance rolls around and Eve, feeling the pressure, awkwardly asks Andrew to go with her, everyone assumes they are Officially Dating and Practically in Love. Overwhelmed, Eve and Andrew just…go with it.

And it’s weird. Neither of them wants this dating thing to mess up their friendship, and they don’t really see each other that way. But they also don’t want to be the one to call things off, the one to make things super awkward. So they both—separately—pledge to be the worst boyfriend or girlfriend ever, leaving it to the other person to break up with them. It would be genius…if the other person weren’t doing the exact same thing.

My Review

This is kind of How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, but make it middle grade and where they’re both trying to get the other person to break up with them.

What really makes this great is the writing. Some scenes are hilariously awkward. Others nailed middle school so perfectly, I felt like I had time-traveled. It’s silly, sometimes gross (fart jokes, etc), but it doesn’t skimp on heart.

The chapters alternate between Eve and Andrew’s points of view, so readers are in on each person’s plan to drive the other to dump them and why it seems like a good idea. Writing both viewpoints also shows us how much Eve and Andrew miss their friendship, what they value about one another, and their hurt feelings and loneliness.

The short chapters make this one an easy, quick read. This would work well for readers who aren’t quite sure they’re interested in romance books yet or readers looking for books about changing relationships in middle school or friend drama.

Content Notes

Recommended for Ages 10 to 14.

Representation
Eve and Andrew are white. Also of interest: Andrew plays quads on his school’s drum line. Eve loves science, specifically space, and compares lots of things to space phenomena. Eve’s parents separate during the story.

Profanity/Crude Language Content
Brief crude humor.

Romance/Sexual Content
A boy and girl hold hands. Some mentions of kissing between other couples, but not on scene. At one point, someone asks a girl what her sexual identity is, and she responds that she doesn’t want to think about that yet, can’t she just be thirteen for now? A nice nod to kids who aren’t sure and resent the pressure of being asked as a way to explain why they aren’t dating or reject someone who asks them out.

Spiritual Content
None.

Violent Content
A prank war escalates, causing some hurt feelings and consequences when shool property is damaged.

Drug Content
None.

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Marvelous Middle-Grade Monday

I’m sharing this post as a part of a weekly round-up of middle-grade posts called Marvelous Middle-Grade Monday. Check out other blogs posting about middle-grade books today on Marvelous Middle-Grade Mondays at Always in the Middle with Greg Pattridge.